crucible of ennui

Cat: Soon I’ll be 5, like the boys.

Me: And then you can conquer them.

Cat: Yeah! ON THE HEAD!!

Me to bff: Remember when you shit yourself?

Bff: Which time?

And that’s why I love her.

Catherine: Oooo - I’m going to marry that guy!

Me: Who? The guy on TV?

Cat: YES!! He’s sooo cool and handsome!

Me: Baby, that’s Darth Vader…

Cat: YEAH! I wanna marry Darth Vader!!

Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will, little Cat.

Niece: Why do my hot dogs always end up looking like a sex crime?

I don’t think I can ever look at a hot dog again.

Apparently you can’t sue God if you can’t serve him the papers.

Oh those crazy Huskers.

Me: How about I make a Chocolate Blackout Cake?

Glenn: I never really did have a hard-on for chocolate.

Catherine: I do.

Glenn: …

Catherine. Yeah. I said it.

Cat: I know how to spell “duck”

Me: Go for it!

Cat: F-U-C-K

Me: Oooo - so close.

It’s time for Girls’ Night. I’ve put it off for too long. I need to have my friends come over with gossip and wine. Everyone has come so far and done so much since the last one.

Beth, Christina, Angela, Bill, Lisa (if you can get away for a night) - it’s time. Details are on the way - October, booze, cackling, NSFW stories. Be there, or we’re going to talk about you.

UPDATE: OCTOBER 18 IS THE DATE.
Bill - it’s your birthday. C’mon and party like it’s your birthday. We’re having a party cause it’s your birthday. Punch and pie will be provided.

Besides being a pajama-jammy-jam weekend, Catherine and I have been discussing our hair.

Me: Your hair is very pretty, Cat. Thick and shiny… you’re very lucky! My hair is fine…

Cat: and funky.

Thanks for that editorial. Much appreciated.

he peers intently
shadows nor dust motes be seen
he’s fucking with us