Male Refrigerator Blindness
Most are familiar with Male Refrigerator Blindness (“MRB”) – the inability of the male to visually identify items within a refrigerator.
Unfortunately few are aware that MRB is sometimes a precursor to Selective Male Blindness (”SMB”). Scientists have discovered that MRB can progress from a general failure to locate milk, eggs, ketchup and cheese to more extreme forms of the disease, characterized by sarcastic disbelief and a tendency towards conspiracy theories in addition to visual impairment.
Over time, SMB can and will develop into a crippling affliction that renders a male unable to find such basic items as baseball hats, keys, magazines and most importantly, the remote control.
Ongoing studies have shown that SMB affects 100% of the male population at various stages of development. Although SMB has been recorded in males as young as 5 to the extreme elderly, studies have shown most cases occur within the adolescent and married male age groups.
Recently, the contagious effect of SMB has been studied to address cases of females unable to locate items while in close proximity of a male suffering from SMB. To date no definitive conclusions have been made. Thankfully scientists discovered that removing the SMB-Male will dramatically increase the chances of the female’s natural resistance to the effects of SMB.
As scientists race towards a cure for MRB and SMB, we can only hope help comes soon.